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Archive for November, 2012

Member of the public

We went swimming last weekend. The kids had a super time, we managed to stay in for a whole hour!
Afterwards we were showering all together in a cubicle. Stacy washed her hair in the weirdest way you possibly could. She pulls it all up and over to the top and dangles it forwards. She then soaps it up and rubs it all like it is getting as tangled as possible. I have watched her wash her hair many a time and told her she is so strange. For some reason it really gets on my nerves. When we go swimming and stuff I tell her she has to wash it normally! So anyway, we were in this cubicle and she starts washing her hair in her own ‘special’ way and I tell her,

‘you must wash it normally in public’ to which she totally ignores me and carries on. After a couple of minutes she says….

‘There is a member of the public with their hands between my legs’ and I look down and see Charlie down there. I laughed so hard and still giggle to myself whenever I think back to her saying it.

On Sunday Rosa came down with a horrible cold. I think she probably caught it at the swimming pool. She was so poorly bless her. I think I caught a much milder version of it and made antibodies to pass on in my milk because she recovered so quickly and today she seems fine again. Yay for breastmilk!

Charlie yesterday woke up coughing. He told Stacy so whilst she was getting ready for work. He says ‘cough’ and then demonstrates for us. She came to say goodbye to me and told me Charlie was unwell but was soldiering on.

Not sure what our plans are this weekend, all I know if that I am the lightest I have been in many years (thank you Slimming World!) and feel FABULOUS! Incidentally Slimming World is starting up in the USA and we have been deemed with the task of spreading the word, so if anyone wants to know more, just let me know 😉

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Discipline

I have been musing a little over this topic the last day or so.

When I was a child, and a teenager, I was hardly ever naughty. I knew that when I was bad, my parents got upset. I had a very strong moral ethic and just never felt the need to rebel.

I am not sure how they achieved this with me. They did spend a lot of time with us at weekends doing fun things and spending time together. Tick. They also gave me pretty much everything I ever wanted, guitar lessons, brownies, gym club, dancing club, toys I wanted, films I wanted to see, food I liked…. in some ways people might say I spoiled. I mostly never had to fight for things. I was given a lot of freedom and lots of love and support.

They didn’t however play with me very often. It was my sister and I that created our world of play. We had a fabulous childhood together, we would spend hours engaged in imaginative play. We used to create huge towns in our playroom consisting of Sylvanian Families and Lego, playmobile etc… We would build dens, dress up, create ‘radio shows’, set up the room to become the ‘Crystal Maze’ play with Primo, Hama beads, play doh, play at being Mummy’s, I could go on forever. My sister meant everything to me as a child.

So….how do I recreate those thoughts and feeling I had as a child and teenager in my own children? We already spend a lot of time with the children, I only work 1 day a week at the moment and on that day Stacy is with them. We always go out and do something fun on our 1 day together as a family.

We have a ‘naughty step’. This is the sticky point. Because yesterday my friend told me it was a bad thing to have a naughty step. That is belittling his feelings and calling him naughty was damaging.

When we first introduced the naughty step, he was on it quite a lot. recently it is less than once a day. The mere threat of the step will halt the bad behaviour. It is quite powerful. When I do put him on the step, he stays there, sometimes crying until I let him off. We talk about why what he did was wrong, he apologises, we hug and have a snuggle and it is all forgotten and he can return to his toys and play. When we are out, we find a place that is the naughty place and carry out the same process. It really really works.

My attachment parenting ‘crunchy’ group I belong to, say this is all wrong wrong wrong. That punishment  is not allowed, that time ins should replace time outs. Cuddles, love, nursing with no reprimand involved at all. Nothing is not allowed. I just can’t go with this. I am pretty crunchy, but I think there needs to be clear boundaries. Parenting of this kind has just got to be confusing, mixed messages abundant.

So we are going to continue with the naughty step. I only have to use it about once a day. There are days it doesn’t get used at all. It is working for us, he isn’t stressed out by it. If he ever shows signs of emotional distress over it, we shall try something else and re-think.

I spent £100 on a woven Oscha wrap this week!! Eek. It is beautiful, but wish I had bought it in the summer when it would have been easier to wear it out.

Charlie’s speech…..has come on leaps and bounds this week! Something has just ‘clicked’ and he is using loads more words. More and more of them are getting clearer and more obvious as to what he is saying. He is also stringing together more words and creating some amazing sentences. He has had us laughing so much this week now his thoughts are being aired and understood.

We were in the car yesterday and he said to my Mum, ‘Nana, Grandad says to you Sue, not Nana, Nana Sue!!!’ and then kept saying Sue over and over. It was so funny to all of us, an observation, being re-told at a later date in clear understandable language. Wow.

A friends child knows his full alphabet, what each letter sounds and looks like and what it stands for. I was amazed. She told me he learnt it all from a DVD. I have bought said DVD. Genius child here we come lol.

A couple of recent photos from playing outside while we picked up the leaves. It was a mild day.

 

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Stacy

Sometimes I think that our partners can sometimes get lost in blogging. I think I am a bit guilty of this.

This post is dedicated to my wife, my love, my Stacy.

I love her so much! I can’t imagine life without her. I live each day hoping she will return home from work soon. We have such fun at the weekends. We tend to pull in the same direction and we hardly ever argue or exchange harsh words.

She is so tolerant, and loving.

She is a fantastic mother to our children.

I am so glad I met her, and that I am sharing my life with her.

Some of the best moments in life are snuggled up in bed together, with my head in her lap, having her stroke my hair whilst she reads to me. Bliss.

Soppy post over.

Can’t wait to make another baby with her ❤

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Night times

For the past couple of weeks, Charlie has started creeping into our room at some point during the night with a pillow, his teddy and a blanket, and making a little bed in the space between our bed and the wall on the floor.

I was first aware of this when Rosa starting grumbling for a feed one night and a little voice said ‘bebe’ and I though, where did that come from?!?! Stacy carried him back to bed.

In the morning we asked him, ‘did you have a good sleep Charlie?’ to which replied ‘no!, dooper froggot with dinosaurs and gribo haggershap Nana!’ in an animated and cross voice. Guess that meant he had a bad dream.

Trouble is, he is now doing it most nights. We never hear him come in. Stacy has taken to carefully putting her feet out of the bed in the dark in case he is there. I guess there is no harm in it. Perhaps he will just stop doing it again one day.

Rosa is constipated. Today I have helped her as much as I can to poo. She passed 3 small rabbit dropping type poos and still hasn’t done a good sized one in about a week. She has dropped a lot of breast feeds recently. Now she feeds in the morning, about lunchtime, late afternoon, before bed and once or twice during the night. I think she is getting dehydrated and as much as I try she won’t take any water from a cup. I have tried warming it up, I have even (strike me down) put a little flavouring into it. She just lets it run out of her mouth. I have tried today to get her to breastfeed a little more often (every 2 hours would please me) but if she doesn’t fancy it, it just isn’t going to happen as I have a delayed let down and she must suck for a good couple of minutes before it happens. Plus she just ends up biting and chewing me.

Just going to leave you with a few out-takes from the Christmas photo shoot we did the other night. Will do a couple of Charlie for the next post. The final picture of the 2 of them ended up being a photoshop job! It is impossible to get 2 children smiling at the same time and all in focus. Impossible I tells ya!!!

 

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Charlie’s speech

Charlie does not talk very well yet. He doesn’t form words very well at all, aeroplane is rar rar, hot is got, dummy is arrwee, lunch is ash…etc. Most of the time I know what he is talking about, anyone else has no clue!

He puts lots and lots of gobbdygook in-between the words I understand. It is quite comical especially when he has so much to say. Sometimes a tirade of talking is met with a bemused look from his mothers, but he is so animated with his face and intonation, he knows what he is saying!

Just very recently we are beginning to get a few sentences. The most conversation I ever had with him when he came into the bedroom.

‘oh Mummy, ere bebe gone?’

‘she’s here next to me, snuggled up for a cuddle’

‘oh, ee apeep’

‘yes she is asleep’

‘oooh ooh Mummy aking up!!! Hello bebe!!!’

to which Rosa opened her eyes and shot her big brother a big beaming smile. He jumped up on the bed and gave her a sloppy kiss and a big hug and starting showing her a train toy he had brought in from his bedroom.

I have toyed with the idea of getting him some speech therapy. But have been talked out of it. Other friends say do it, what have you got to lose? The recent improvement makes me think he will get there in time. I do want to send him to pre-school in Jan though, and speech that is more understandable to strangers would be good.

We recently went to play with a little friend who has excellent speech. After we had gone, his Mum text me to say that he was now talking in gobbledygoop ever since we had left. He had also declared that Charlie spoke his own language!! Another friend with a boy with really excellent speech chats all the time. She has a running commentary on her life and it drives her nuts. She says I am the lucky one!

So for now we are going to just leave him a bit longer. I sense a bit of an explosion soon.

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Random recent stuff

I realise it has been a while since a post, so you are about to get a whole loads of randomness from the last few weeks….

Foot printing and the resulting Shrek impression,

 

Little Halloween cats and pumpkins…no I didn’t get a good picture of Charlie, but he DID wear it when we said he wouldn’t get any sweets without it…even the hat!!

 

 

Crocheting owl hats,

and remembrance day poppies

Rocking the mohawk we usually flatten down every morning

Redecorating the dining room

Attending lesbian civil partnerships

and munching the squishyness!!

Will try and keep up a bit better!!

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